The most heartfelt letter I've ever written...and it's to you. Please read. Please share.
** I wrote this while listening to the instrumental attached. Feel free to put it on while reading. :-) **
Passion. Not everyone has “a passion”. I was lucky enough not to be one of those people. Music has been my passion since I was born. My family always kept me around good music - Michael Jackson, Billy Joel, David Benoit, Elton John, Mariah Carey - to name a few. I fell in love with Hip-Hop when I heard Method Man and the Wu-Tang Clan blaring out of a boombox on the Path train at Journal Square on my way to my dad’s place in Queens. Years later, Eminem’s “The Marshall Mathers LP” was released and it made me feel like if he could do it, I could too. That’s when I decided I wanted to make a living out of my passion. My first raps were terrible. Bry and I wrote together as a duo and when we look back at it now, we laugh. Those times were necessary though, because that path made me the artist I am today. (I’d like to think that I’m not as bad now lol.) Joel, Edwin, Bry, Paul and I started the Triangle Offense brand on September 6th, 2009. While we were already a group years before, that day is when we decided we wanted to separate ourselves from the hobbyists and would treat our music as a business. Being together for a little over 3 years, we’ve released 2 mixtapes, tons of songs and videos on YouTube, performed at hundreds of venues (I’m so proud to say we rocked Irving Plaza), met thousands of new people (Jin the MC telling me he knew about us before I met him - still unreal), and best of all, made countless memories with every single one of you.
Destiny. I always felt like I was destined to do this. You made me feel like I was destined to do this. I love y’all for that. Destiny is often seen as this thing that we have no control over; but if there’s anything I’ve learned since being with TO, it’s that destiny is actually determined by us - by you - by me. Many new opportunities have recently come my way and I’ve been waiting for these opportunities to come for YEARS, even before starting TO. On the evening of January 21st, 2013, it became clear to me that I had to make the most difficult decision of my life. I have decided to leave Triangle Offense and music altogether. As I write this, I stop…and stare at the last line. It still doesn’t seem real. I can’t help but cry. My music. My passion. My love. My life. The music we were making was our best yet. I still had so much to show…to say…to share…to fight for. Music has been who I am for so much of my existence. I even thought it was WHY I existed. Maybe it still is? But right now, I strongly feel like I owe it to myself to finally take these new chances, as I wasn’t even allowed to have them before. I always encourage others to follow their hearts, but I never thought MY heart would lead me away from music. This is all so bittersweet. I’m excited for my future, but I’ve been in a lot of pain in the past year or so because I’ve suffered so many significant losses behind the scenes. I would turn to music to help me vent those emotions, but now, losing music makes me feel like I have nothing left. I love music so much, more than anything I’ve ever known. I can’t imagine living without it…but I have to find out if I can.
So to everyone who has supported Triangle Offense, been a part of our movement, helped us carry boxes/shoot videos/put together CDs, collaborated with us, made suggestions in songs, inspired our writing, come to our shows, sung our lyrics, bought our shirts, wrote to us, wrote about us, “liked” or shared our music, clicked on anything that had to do with us - THANK YOU…from everything that I am. Without you, none of what I experienced would have been possible. Without you, none of this would have been so difficult to walk away from. Without you, I wouldn’t be so in love with music. What am I going to do now? I don’t know. Where am I going to live? I don’t know. I’ve never had this type of freedom. But wherever I end up, I hope you remember me. I learned something from you all and I hope to have touched your life in some way as well. I hope you keep me in your heart, as I will keep each and every one of you in mine. Farewell.
Patrick Cruz - formerly known as “Sci” of Triangle Offense. #1up
P.S. - “1up” represents opportunity. We all have one life, but it’s up to you to truly make the best of it. Give yourself an unlimited amount of chances. And if you fall down, 1up. Try again. Keep living.
Patrick “Sci” Cruz
Co-Founder / Producer / Artist